Some time ago as I observed the consequences of a situation it reminded of the dangers of asking God if something is okay for you to do after you know He has already told you, “No.” I drafted this post then, but never completed and published it. I ran across the draft this past weekend and realized the message was a good one for me to revisit at this particular point in my life. (It’s interesting how we usually have to live our sermons!) So, here it is. J
We should realize that when God says “No,” He means “No.” He’s a loving Father. He doesn’t say no to something that will be good for us; He only says no to things that will turn out to not be good – no matter what they may look like to us!
What I do not understand is why, after being told “No,” we continue to ask. If it is a timing issue, then He would not say “No.” He would say, “not now” or “not yet.” Again, when He says “No,” He really means “No.”
Let me put this in human terms. If we ask our natural father if we can do something and he can see the consequences of the decision will not be good, a loving father will say “No.” But, if he knows it is something that good for us or is okay (of no long-term consequence either way) but we’re not ready for it, he won’t say, “No.” He’ll say, “Not now.” He may give more direction, like “when you’re ready for it” or “when you’re 16” or, depending on his circumstances, “when I can arrange it." In essence, he's saying, “when the timing is right.” Then, we have a timeframe or the permission to ask again to see if it is now time.
However, it’s not uncommon for us to go back to our earthly fathers who have told us “No” and begin to beg or try to maneuver (dare I say “manipulate”) them into changing their mind. Likewise, many of us go back to our Heavenly Father after He has told us “No” and do the same thing.
God knows the ultimate outcome and consequences of our decisions. The immediate decision may seem harmless to us, or even beneficial, or at least bringing pleasure in some way. But God knows the end of the matter. Jeremiah 29:11 tells us that the Lord declares:
For I
know the plans I have for you … plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans
to give you hope and a future. (NIV)
When we insist on a path different from His plan, not only are we not assured of the prosperity we would find in His plan for us, we can also move ourselves outside of the realm of protection, sometimes straight into harm’s path – whether that harm be physical, financial, relational, or spiritual.
Many times over the years I have had someone explain to me that God was telling them that something they wanted to do was okay to pursue, even though they had previously told me that He had clearly told them not to do so. Does God change His mind? Sometimes it may appear that way. But let’s take a look at an example in Scripture where it appears that He did.
The story of Balaam begins in Numbers 22. Balak calls upon him to come and curse the children of Israel. We don’t know anything about Balaam before this, but it is apparent he has a strong relationship with God because in verse 9, “God came to Balaam.” Since there is no indication that this was surprising in any way to Balaam, it seems safe to assume that it was not an uncommon experience.
God asks Balaam a question. We know that God already knew the answer (as He did when He asked Adam and Eve who told them they were naked or asked Cain where his brother was). I learned long ago that when God asks a question, He isn’t looking for information; He’s looking to reveal something to us about ourselves. In this case, it was about Balaam’s relationship with the men who were present.
In verse 12 God specifically and clearly tells Balaam, “Do not go with them; you shall not curse the people, for they are blessed.” At first, Balaam responds in obedience. (Verse 13 says that “Balaam arose in the morning and said to Balak’s leaders, ‘Go back to your land, for the Lord has refused to let me go with you.’”)
But Balak is persistent and sends more men, “more numerous and more distinguished than the former” and ups the ante by offering “honor” and whatever else Balaam wants. The enemy knows our weaknesses; he knows what will tempt each of us. For some is it money. For some it is honor or prestige. For some it is relationship with someone in particular. Satan knows how to have someone – often it’s someone we consider Godly – dangle just the right carrot in front of us to get us to go where he wants us to go instead of staying put where God has us (or going the direction God wants us to go).
To me, Balaam’s first step down the wrong path was when he said:
Now
please, you also stay here tonight, and I will find out what else the Lord
will speak to me. (Num 22:19)
When God has already come to you and said not only “Do not go with them” but also “you shall not curse the people, for they are blessed,” (Num 22:12) and you are being asked to do is to go with them and curse the people God has told you not to curse, why are you asking for more information?
At that point, Balaam was not in need of any more information. Should he go? No. Should he curse those people? No. Period. End of discussion.
When we, like Balaam, go back to re-ask the same question that God has already answered, we are revealing our heart. Our heart is set to do differently from what God has directed us.
We are wanting God to change His mind. We are wanting Him to change His “No” to “Yes.” We need to learn a lesson from Balaam that He will sometimes do that – but it is not to our advantage when He does!
Verse 20 makes it appear that God has changed His mind. God comes to Balaam again, and gives him permission to go, though He gives Balaam restrictions on what he can say.
God
came to Balaam at night and said to him, “If the men have come to call you,
rise up and go with them; but only the word which I speak to you shall you do.”
While God may have given Balaam permission to go, He was not pleased that he did. In fact, God was angry with Balaam about his decision to go.
But
God was angry because he was going, and the angel of the Lord took his
stand in the way as an adversary against him. (Num 22:22)
HINT 1: When “the angel of the Lord” – generally believed to be the pre-incarnate Christ, also known as the Lord of Hosts – stands in our way as an adversary, perhaps we should reconsider where we are heading!
But not Balaam. Even after going through the whole issue of his donkey saving his life from the angel of the Lord three times and the donkey talking to him, even asking Balaam questions which Balaam answered, Balaam doesn’t “get” the message!
HINT 2: When your donkey starts talking to you, it’s time to pay attention to what it has to say!
Finally, Balaam, the prophet, sees what the donkey has been seeing – “the angel of the Lord standing in the way with his drawn sword in his hand.” He says to Balaam:
“Behold,
I have come out as an adversary, because your way was contrary to me.” (Num 22:31-32)
So the angel of the Lord (Christ) has just said (1) He has come out as Balaam’s adversary and (2) Balaam’s way is contrary to Him. Wouldn’t you think at this point it’s time to let that donkey turn around and take you home? Not Balaam. And, unfortunately, all too often, not us either.
No, we don’t usually see the Lord standing in our way with a sword drawn or have a donkey carry on a conversation with us. But God often tries to speak to us just as clearly. He’ll send people with counsel. But we decide they just don’t love us and don’t want us “to have anything good,” or that they are jealous of our opportunity. He’ll send a message across our path through a sermon, a teaching, a word of wisdom, or a prophetic word, but we decide it doesn’t apply to our situation or we twist its (rather obvious) meaning to suit what we want to hear. Or we flock to those who will tell us what we want to hear.
For
the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but wanting to
have their ears tickled, they will accumulate for themselves teachers in
accordance to their own desires, and will turn away their ears from the truth
and will turn aside to myths. (2 Tim 4:3-4)
Balaam persists in his desire to go to Balak. He repents for not realizing the Lord was standing against Him, and “offers” to turn back.
Balaam
said to the angel of the Lord, “I have sinned, for I did not know that you were
standing in the way against me. Now then, if it is displeasing to you, I will
turn back.” (Num
22:34)
As I said before, wouldn’t you think by this point Balaam would be heading for home? The angel of the Lord has already told Him “your way was contrary to me.” If the Lord stands there telling us that our way is contrary to Him, why would we respond "if it is displeasing to you, I will turn back"? Shouldn’t we just repent and turn back - quickly? Not Balaam. All too often, not us either.
I believe God gives Balaam permission to go because He knows what is in Balaam’s heart. If his heart had not been so set on going, he (1) never would have started the journey and (2) would be quickly turning back without asking, again, what he should do. God said “Do not go with them” and now the angel of the Lord is saying “your way was contrary to me.” Balaam didn’t need to ask God again what His opinion was about the journey. God had already made it abundantly clear. But Balaam still had his heart set on going – so that he might receive honor from Balak. What are we willing to sacrifice, how far will we push, to get the thing that gratifies us - the thing our heart desires?
Once again, Balaam is given permission to continue and does so, even though it is obviously not what God wants him to do.
But
the angel of the Lord said to Balaam, “Go with the men, but you shall speak
only the word which I tell you.” (Num 22:35)
If all of God's counsel does not keep you from going somewhere you should not (or doing something you should not), He can still hem you in so that you can't really enjoy it when you get there! As I have heard Bishop Bill Hamon say many times, "God won't make you violate your will, but He knows how to make you willing!" (Ask Jonah!)
We know the rest of the story. When he gets to Balak, he cannot curse the people whom God has blessed. Three times he tries and three times he blesses them instead. So, instead of receiving honor and riches from Balak, Balak is even more angry with him that when he refused to come. So Balaam does not benefit from the trip, nor does Balak.
Some might say, “no harm done.” You could claim that, in fact, Balaam did speak the blessing of the Lord over the children of Israel and he even provided a Messianic prophecy in his final discourse to Balak in Numbers 24:17. So, what’s the big deal? God allowed Balaam to go and constrained him so that he blessed God’s people. Right?
Let’s not try to justify disobedience so quickly.
There is an often overlooked end to this story. While Balaam did prophesy over the people of Israel only blessing, as God directed, the way Balaam is referenced within the New Testament shows how he was remembered - how he was viewed by God. There are three New Testament references to Balaam:
…
Having a heart trained in greed, accursed children; forsaking the right way,
they have gone astray, having followed the way of Balaam, the son of
Beor, who loved the wages of unrighteousness. (2 Pet 2:14b-15)
Woe
to them! For they have gone the way of Cain, and for pay they have
rushed headlong into the error of Balaam, and perished in the
rebellion of Korah.
(Jude 1:11)
In the first two passages, it is clear that God’s record of the event was that Balaam had “gone for the gold” – that his motivation was money. But, it’s unlikely that he actually received any pay, because he refused to do what Balak requested. Hence, he did not get that which he sought - the money or the honor. He did not "enjoy" his trip after all!
It’s the third reference that I find most enlightening.
But I
have a few things against you, because you have there some who hold the teaching of
Balaam, who kept teaching Balak to put a stumbling block before the sons of
Israel, to eat things sacrificed to idols and to commit acts of immorality. (Rev 2:14)
While we do not have this recorded in Numbers, when Jesus is speaking to John in the vision that we have recorded as the book of Revelation, He reveals what Balaam did while on his visit to see Balak. Somewhere in their conversation that is not recorded for us, Balaam told Balak how to make the children of Israel sin against God so that His blessing and protection would be lifted from them. If you continue reading in Numbers, the next chapter talks about these very things happening, which substantiates the statements made. Remember it is the resurrected Christ that is making these statements to John. He would know!
We can talk ourselves into believing that God is telling us something is okay when we know He’s already said, “No.” He may even have changed what He is telling us, as He did with Balaam, if we have persisted long enough in continuing to ask after He answered. We have no reason to be asking Him the same question over and over after He has answered. If He’s answered our question, all we are doing is trying to get Him to give us permission to do what we have set our heart to do. As with Balaam, sometimes He will. But instead of following Christ's example to pray "not my will, but Thine be done," we are following the example of Balaam.
I do not want to be like Balaam – and have Christ’s assessment of the fruit of my life being something quite different from what it should be. I do not want to place myself in a position to compromise or, worse yet, collaborate with the enemy. When God says, “don’t go,” it’s really best not to go!
I have often heard people who chose to continue on a path that God had told them to turn back from explain, even after admitting that they were in disobedience while on it, why it was okay that they had taken it. I have to admit, I have trouble with that “logic” (justification). They usually point to a time here or there along the way that God used them during that time or how they grew because of it.
God used Balaam to bless His people. But the eventual fruit of Balaam’s journey was recorded as being greed and having taught the enemy of God’s people how to cause them to stumble in their relationship with God. God’s view is sometimes different from our own. We sometimes go where we shouldn’t (get into a situation, relationship, business deal) and leave (get out of it) without knowing the full impact of what our disobedience has cost – not only for us but also in the lives of others.
My prayer is that I become more and more quick to obey. Along with that I must also reject the temptation to try to convince God that my way is better than His. It never is!
All of that said, I am grateful that we serve God under the New Covenant, not the Old. He is loving and His mercies are new every morning. If we find that we have traveled down a wrong path, the appropriate action is to repent for our disobedience and turn around. His forgiveness is sure. And He will lead us back to the right path.
